Week 4
Trainer: Jeramie
Location: Glenwood Rapid Fitness
There is only one way to start this post: ATTENNNN-TION!!!
After three weeks of training, I thought I was getting the hang of the training thing. Ummm . . . enter Jeramie to prove me wrong. Jeramie believes in 4 sessions a week and full-body workouts every time. Hooah*.
The first minute of the first session started out with squats. After four he stops me and tells me my hip flexors are stiff. Who is this dude, the Body Whisperer? He could tell after four squats? Thanks to a box of hair dye, there are a few moments every morning that I forget that I am not the young, flexible, smartass cheerleader I once was. Thanks to Jeramie, I was reminded how my body had betrayed me and dared to get old on me. I'm not gonna lie, when he told me that I needed to work on my flexibility, I got a little choked up. My nickname used to be "pretzel". Flexibility was never a problem for me. But, the repercussions of late night of movie watching and sedentary living were surfacing once again.
After about 10 minutes, the whine was in full effect. "My hands hurt. My legs burn. I caaaaann't!" I looked up. No mercy. He looked like he'd never heard anyone whine before. Who's he training? Who doesn't whine during push-ups with weights?? Every time he commanded that I get lower in my squats, lunges, or push-ups I had to fight the urge to shout "Yeeees, Drill Sergeant!!!" in my best Forrest Gump voice. Hooah
I couldn't count. I couldn't spell. I could only concentrate on not throwing up or passing out. Tint my sweat red and put some instrumental rock in the background b/c I am officially Gatorade commercial worthy. I realized that I am fast becoming one of the most annoying types of pests at a gym. I am becoming the "sound effects girl". Grunting, crying, whining are all part of my go-to monologue. Clearly, I have hung my pride on the wall next to my keys, but I can't help it. Whining is all I can do to keep from dying - or at least that's what it seems like. I have regressed from being Hilary Banks to Steve Urkel. "Oww. . . that hurts!" "Did I do that?"
Jeramie clearly practices what he preaches. "Fit" is not quite the word for him. His muscles have muscles. His shirt sleeves must wince in pain every morning from being stretched to the limit. I am working muscles I didn't know I had. And all in 30 minute sessions. As much as I want to curse him for the experience, I can't. Because in the days since our sessions: 10 lb. weights don't feel as heavy as they used to, I can do 7 tricep pull downs (without whining), and 2 UNASSISTED pull-ups.
If you're ever feeling like you're stuck in a fitness rut or you've plateaued or something . . . go see Jeramie. He will show you exercises that will indeed bring the Urkel out of you. Hooah.
I gotta say, after four weeks of training, I am feeling stronger, faster, and more energetic. I still don't think you can tell really on the outside (I was humbled just this morning by looking at my reflection. The rolls have not left the building) . But I definitely am hearing the Six Million Dollar Man sound effect when I run. I am indeed being "rebuilt", one trainer at a time. Hooah.
And now, for your listening pleasure:
*Hooah (pronounced /ˈhuːɑː/) is a U.S. Army battle cry used[1] by soldiers "Referring to or meaning anything and everything except no."
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Every day is not rainbows and butterflies
Sometimes I lose sight of what I'm trying to do here. I'm trying to show my STRUGGLE and my JOURNEY to get back into shape. I don't want to make it seem effortless like some people (yeah, I'm looking at you Marie Osmond) because it's not. Every day is not rainbows and butterflies. Some days are easy and some are frustrating and hard. Just because I'm starting a journey and attempting to better myself inside and out, doesn't mean I've been granted an umbrella shielding me from of life's rainy days. I am not immune from a bad day. There will be those days where one minute I'm a happy-go-lucky kid in a Letterman's jacket and the next I'm an evil, dancing and singing zombie (If you don't get that and you are over the age of 27, shame on you).
The other day, I had one of those rainy days. Tears were shed and noses were blown. Nothing traumatic, just a bad day. My first instinct was to go straight to the pantry, declare "Pity Party 2010" officially ON, and hang out with my friends: Chips, Cookies and Candy. But, much to my surprise, I didn't reach for anything. I just stood there. As quickly as Ms. Hyde made her greedy, glutinous appearance - Dr. JeKAIll (get it?) reappeared to scream PUT THE COOKIES DOWN AND WALK AWAY!!!!
Walking away wasn't easy. But how was crying into a pint of Ben & Jerry's going to make anything any better? Instead, I turned to my journal and wrote until my hand hurt then took a hot shower. Being an emotional eater since the early-90s, it's hard not to feed my feelings. It's been a go-to strategy since the days of Brenda and Dylan (Pre- Dylan and Kelly, Kelly and Brandon, Brandon and Emily, etc)
When I was four-years-old, and I watched Cookie Monster feed his feelings it was cute and it was funny (Thanks PBS for teaching reading, mathematics, and gluttony by the way). At 30-blahblahblah years old, using food to cope with just about everything isn't so funny and I'm pretty positive it is not at all cute. I need to rewire my habits. I can't rid myself of bad days, but I can adjust how I deal with them.
"We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails" - Dolly Parton
The other day, I had one of those rainy days. Tears were shed and noses were blown. Nothing traumatic, just a bad day. My first instinct was to go straight to the pantry, declare "Pity Party 2010" officially ON, and hang out with my friends: Chips, Cookies and Candy. But, much to my surprise, I didn't reach for anything. I just stood there. As quickly as Ms. Hyde made her greedy, glutinous appearance - Dr. JeKAIll (get it?) reappeared to scream PUT THE COOKIES DOWN AND WALK AWAY!!!!
Walking away wasn't easy. But how was crying into a pint of Ben & Jerry's going to make anything any better? Instead, I turned to my journal and wrote until my hand hurt then took a hot shower. Being an emotional eater since the early-90s, it's hard not to feed my feelings. It's been a go-to strategy since the days of Brenda and Dylan (Pre- Dylan and Kelly, Kelly and Brandon, Brandon and Emily, etc)
When I was four-years-old, and I watched Cookie Monster feed his feelings it was cute and it was funny (Thanks PBS for teaching reading, mathematics, and gluttony by the way). At 30-blahblahblah years old, using food to cope with just about everything isn't so funny and I'm pretty positive it is not at all cute. I need to rewire my habits. I can't rid myself of bad days, but I can adjust how I deal with them.
"We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails" - Dolly Parton
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
$4.04 Meal
Anytime I see some pretty cheap items in the grocery story that together would make a pretty great meal, I'm going to post my findings. The goal is to inspire you to avoid the drive through window!! You CAN find something healthy, filling and edible for the price of a McDonalds Value Meal.
$2.79 ground chicken
$1.25 steam fresh veggies (carrots, watercress, broccoli)
______
$4.04 (plus tax)
The ground chicken made about 3 decent sized chicken burger patties. The package of veggies was a 4 serving (really 2 serving in my opinion) package. I didn't use any fancy seasonings, just Mrs. Dash.
It was YUMMY!!! AND enough food for lunch and dinner.
$2.79 ground chicken
$1.25 steam fresh veggies (carrots, watercress, broccoli)
______
$4.04 (plus tax)
The ground chicken made about 3 decent sized chicken burger patties. The package of veggies was a 4 serving (really 2 serving in my opinion) package. I didn't use any fancy seasonings, just Mrs. Dash.
It was YUMMY!!! AND enough food for lunch and dinner.
Written all over my face
Week 4
I'm just going to dive right into discussing my weekly meeting with Dr. Josh b/c frankly, it's just too darn hot to beat around the bush (are you KIDDING me with this humidity?!?!?!)
During my last meeting with Dr. Josh, he looked over my food journal and asked me how I was feeling. Aside from sweating like a pig, I've been feeling pretty good lately. No crazy cravings. I was "thisclose" to a big pile of onion rings and I didn't want one. He asked me if I've noticed any changes yet. Because I just can't bring myself to get on the scale yet, I don't have any lb. changes to report. I haven't had the guts to try on my jeans yet (I don't want to be disappointed and frustrated if they don't fit over my thighs yet) so I don't have any changes to report there. But there is one thing that's changed ginormously. . . . MY SKIN.
I have never had problem skin. It wouldn't be right for me to sit here and boo-hoo like I was worthy of being the "before" picture in a Proactiv commercial. But, over the past year, my skin has started to look dull, bumpy, and gray. I had come to the advanced scientific conclusion that clogged pores and theoccasional fairly frequent blackhead were my karma for being gossipy in high school (Ok fine. . . . being gossipy until I was 29).
But lately, my skin has started to glow (not comic book "I fell in a vat of hazardous waste" glow. . . but glow). I haven't invested crazy amounts of money into face washes, scrubs or moisturizers. I use Purpose soap and some generic moisturizer from Target. But my skin hasn't looked this good in ages. Even more than when I could afford $120 facials every two weeks and $100 moisturizers. Turns out my skin was trying to tell me something all along. The clogged pores and dull complexion were hints of how cruel I was treating my body by eating Chik-fil-A morning, noon and night and not drinking enough water. My body's distress signal was literally written all over my face. It's possible that the signal was written in braille my skin was so bumpy. But I don't need an expert to tell me that my skin was P.O'd at me.
Think about that if you're spending a ton of money on creams, facials, scrubs, etc. EATING HEALTHY IS THE ULTIMATE BEAUTY SECRET. If you can't afford the beauty regime of the rich and famous, that's ok. Doesn't mean that the fantastic results will elude you just because you (or I) can't invest $3680 a year
($120 facials x 2 a month x12)
+ $600 in various products throughout the year
+ $200 face brush =
my 2007 spendings on skincare related products and services. Shall we all wince in unison? Aaaand. . . go.
Try a month of eating super healthy and upping your water intake and see what happens. It's definitely cheaper and less traumatic that sitting through pore extractions (by a large woman who had garlic and liver for lunch) during a facial.
I'm not saying all of the fancy products are bogus BUT you may not need fancy products to get the results you're looking for. What's the worst that could happen if you try eating healthy to achieve better skin experiment anyways?? You'll save money??? You'll have more counter space in the bathroom than you ever dreamed from throwing out all the unnecessary face creams, gels, etc?? Like a lot of other aspects of this journey that I'm on I'm finding that improvement begins from the inside. Why should skincare be any different?
Warning: If the idea of getting carded to buy lotto tickets is just too much, you may not want to try this experiment. Looking younger can be such a hassle sometimes
One final note: I am not saying that getting facials is completely unnecessary. One of my best friends in LA is an amazing esthetician and she does an amazing job with people's skin. I AM saying that if you take care of yourself nutrition wise, you'll find that you won't have to get "the works" when/if you DO get a facial. You can go for the "relaxation" facial instead of the "problem skin" facial that involves poking, squeezing, wincing and tears . Imagine being the person that is the envy of everyone else in the spa because you have such amazing skin. You might find yourself the subject of some gossip - What's her secret?? I heard she washes her face with dolphin poop! I heard she sleeps in a hyperbolic chamber! I heard she has a painting of herself in an attic that ages but she doesn't! But don't look to me to participate in the gossip. . . I've kicked that habitfor the most part sometimes kind of.
I'm just going to dive right into discussing my weekly meeting with Dr. Josh b/c frankly, it's just too darn hot to beat around the bush (are you KIDDING me with this humidity?!?!?!)
During my last meeting with Dr. Josh, he looked over my food journal and asked me how I was feeling. Aside from sweating like a pig, I've been feeling pretty good lately. No crazy cravings. I was "thisclose" to a big pile of onion rings and I didn't want one. He asked me if I've noticed any changes yet. Because I just can't bring myself to get on the scale yet, I don't have any lb. changes to report. I haven't had the guts to try on my jeans yet (I don't want to be disappointed and frustrated if they don't fit over my thighs yet) so I don't have any changes to report there. But there is one thing that's changed ginormously. . . . MY SKIN.
I have never had problem skin. It wouldn't be right for me to sit here and boo-hoo like I was worthy of being the "before" picture in a Proactiv commercial. But, over the past year, my skin has started to look dull, bumpy, and gray. I had come to the advanced scientific conclusion that clogged pores and the
But lately, my skin has started to glow (not comic book "I fell in a vat of hazardous waste" glow. . . but glow). I haven't invested crazy amounts of money into face washes, scrubs or moisturizers. I use Purpose soap and some generic moisturizer from Target. But my skin hasn't looked this good in ages. Even more than when I could afford $120 facials every two weeks and $100 moisturizers. Turns out my skin was trying to tell me something all along. The clogged pores and dull complexion were hints of how cruel I was treating my body by eating Chik-fil-A morning, noon and night and not drinking enough water. My body's distress signal was literally written all over my face. It's possible that the signal was written in braille my skin was so bumpy. But I don't need an expert to tell me that my skin was P.O'd at me.
Think about that if you're spending a ton of money on creams, facials, scrubs, etc. EATING HEALTHY IS THE ULTIMATE BEAUTY SECRET. If you can't afford the beauty regime of the rich and famous, that's ok. Doesn't mean that the fantastic results will elude you just because you (or I) can't invest $3680 a year
($120 facials x 2 a month x12)
+ $600 in various products throughout the year
+ $200 face brush =
my 2007 spendings on skincare related products and services. Shall we all wince in unison? Aaaand. . . go.
Try a month of eating super healthy and upping your water intake and see what happens. It's definitely cheaper and less traumatic that sitting through pore extractions (by a large woman who had garlic and liver for lunch) during a facial.
I'm not saying all of the fancy products are bogus BUT you may not need fancy products to get the results you're looking for. What's the worst that could happen if you try eating healthy to achieve better skin experiment anyways?? You'll save money??? You'll have more counter space in the bathroom than you ever dreamed from throwing out all the unnecessary face creams, gels, etc?? Like a lot of other aspects of this journey that I'm on I'm finding that improvement begins from the inside. Why should skincare be any different?
Warning: If the idea of getting carded to buy lotto tickets is just too much, you may not want to try this experiment. Looking younger can be such a hassle sometimes
One final note: I am not saying that getting facials is completely unnecessary. One of my best friends in LA is an amazing esthetician and she does an amazing job with people's skin. I AM saying that if you take care of yourself nutrition wise, you'll find that you won't have to get "the works" when/if you DO get a facial. You can go for the "relaxation" facial instead of the "problem skin" facial that involves poking, squeezing, wincing and tears . Imagine being the person that is the envy of everyone else in the spa because you have such amazing skin. You might find yourself the subject of some gossip - What's her secret?? I heard she washes her face with dolphin poop! I heard she sleeps in a hyperbolic chamber! I heard she has a painting of herself in an attic that ages but she doesn't! But don't look to me to participate in the gossip. . . I've kicked that habit
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Wonder if they have lifting gloves with Hello Kitty on them?
Week 3: Training Summary
Location: Glenwood Ave. Rapid Fitness
Trainer: Bryan W.
Yeah, yeah. . . I'm 5 days behind with this post. Blame it on the rain (. . . that was fallin', fallin'! ) or something. So, Week 3 I was assigned to Bryan W. who trains from the Glenwood location. Woo-hoo! This location is closer to my house, which means 10 extra minutes of snoozing before 9am sessions!
On our first day of training, I find out that Bryan's wife gave birth FIVE days prior. There he was, a sleep deprived new dad and he was smiling and ready to go. I, on the other hand, could hear my pillows calling me from the gym and was ready to go back to bed. I tried my best to weasle out of working out.
KZ: "Oh wow. You know. . . we can do this another time if you want.
I'm sure you want to go home and be with the baby"
BW: "Nope. Let's get going!"
Drat. And so it began. . .
Bryan's training philosophy is to train 3x's a week: One day for lower body, one day for core, one day for upper body.
Day 1: Lower Body
TEN minutes into my session and I'm already whining.
KZ: "It BURNS! My legs are BURNING!"
BW: "Yup. That's the lactic acid building up in your muscles. That means it's working"
KZ: "I'M LACTOSE INTOLERANT!!! I think I should stop!!"
Note: I'm not stupid enough to really get lactose and lactic confused. But friends, I would have done an-y-thing to stop the burn. Anything. One thing is absolutely clear: downhill skiing is nowhere in my future. Not that it is was really on the list of things I was dying to try, but remaining in a skiers squat for more than 5 seconds is my idea of punishment. Lindsey Vonn, you are a superhuman freak.
Next we moved on to wall sits. Friends, I have a longstanding relationship with wall sits. Once, when I was a little college cheerleader, we were doing wall sits for our conditioning and I sliced my elbow on a metal outlet cover and had to go get stitches and a shot and I was THRILLED because it meant I got out of the wall sits. There I was bleeding profusely and I was happy. THAT is how much I hate wall sits. I began to spell (See entry: Counting is so 2009) the name of every friend I have every had in my life: J-U-L-I-E, R-E-N-E-E, K-A-R-E-N, J-E-N-N, J-E-N-N-Y, -J-E-N-N-I-F-E-R (Wow, do I know a lot of Jenn's or what!). After a more names, I couldn't even speak. The burn was winning. After a few seconds of silence Bryan asked:
BW: Who's name are you spelling now?
KZ: G-O-D
If life was fair, one wall sit would be all it would take to get legs like Jennifer Aniston. But alas, it is not. But I did it! I didn't quit!! I cried and I whined (I may have even screamed), but I did not quit!
At the end of session 1, Bryan instructed me to do 20 minutes of cardio. But before I could take one step towards my beloved Precor 100i, he said that I need to do the Stairmaster to complete the lower body workout. Now, if you did not just think to yourself, "Oh! That poor girl! What has she done to deserve that?!?" then clearly you do not know what a StairMASTER is.
THIS is a Stairmaster:
I tried everything to get out of it.
KZ: "I'm scared of heights!"
BW: "It's about 2ft. high. Get on"
KZ: "I have vertigo."
BW: "What's that?"
**** Crickets ****
KZ: "I am morally and ethically opposed to anything with the word 'master' in it"
BW: "Get on."
I stopped for a break every 5 minutes. And I was on a low speed! But if a machine can make even your forearms sweat after 5 minutes, it must be working. And I have to admit, my buns felt a bit more steel-ish after I got off.
Day 2: Core
Act I.
BW: "Now you're gonna go in a Wonder Woman position and lift your arms and legs like you're flying"
KZ: "Technically, Wonder Woman didn't fly. She sat in an invisible jet. So, can I just practice sitting?"
BW: "No."
Act II.
KZ: "How many more do I have to do?"
BW: "Go until I say stop"
KZ: "But I need to know what to spell!"
BW: "Go for the alphabet"
Act III.
KZ: "You know, I totally understand if you want to stop and go home to your . . . "
BW: "No. Keep going"
KZ: ". . . baby"
KZ attempts fake tears for sympathy. It is not successful.
Day 3: Arms
KZ: "I can't lift anymore"
BW: "Yes, you can"
KZ: "I caaaaaannnnnnn'ttttt" (whining really is an artform if done correctly)
BW: "Just try it"
I did it !!!!! Success!!!! Screaming "King Kong ain't got nothin' on me!" is considered. Then reconsidered.
My arms feel like Gumby and I have BLISTERS. BLISTERS!!!! I haven't had blisters since my monkey bar days. I have my first official war wound from all of this. Guess it's time to get lifting gloves. You know the people in the gym who have lifting gloves. They are usually the badasses. Woo-hoo! I'm on my way to being a badass. Wonder if they have lifting gloves with Hello Kitty on them?
One of the great things about Bryan is that he is an educator and a nurturer. Maybe it's that dad instinct going into overdrive but every exercise came with a mini-lesson. I learned what muscle group I was working, why I was working it, and how it will help me in everyday activities. I wonder if he could show me some exercises to do in preparation for the semi-annual sale at Fred Segal. Just try to take those leggings out of my hand THIS time actress-who-shall-not-be-named, Just try! I'll get you my pretty! Muah-hahahahaha!
I have to say that Bryan gives a whole new meaning to the word dedication. Five days into fatherhood and he's back, giving me his full attention. If he can make it in, then I really don't have any excuse. I'm going to try to remember that every time I try to convince myself that a new episode of America's Next Top Model is reason enough to not go to the gym.
Location: Glenwood Ave. Rapid Fitness
Trainer: Bryan W.
Yeah, yeah. . . I'm 5 days behind with this post. Blame it on the rain (. . . that was fallin', fallin'! ) or something. So, Week 3 I was assigned to Bryan W. who trains from the Glenwood location. Woo-hoo! This location is closer to my house, which means 10 extra minutes of snoozing before 9am sessions!
On our first day of training, I find out that Bryan's wife gave birth FIVE days prior. There he was, a sleep deprived new dad and he was smiling and ready to go. I, on the other hand, could hear my pillows calling me from the gym and was ready to go back to bed. I tried my best to weasle out of working out.
KZ: "Oh wow. You know. . . we can do this another time if you want.
I'm sure you want to go home and be with the baby"
BW: "Nope. Let's get going!"
Drat. And so it began. . .
Bryan's training philosophy is to train 3x's a week: One day for lower body, one day for core, one day for upper body.
Day 1: Lower Body
TEN minutes into my session and I'm already whining.
KZ: "It BURNS! My legs are BURNING!"
BW: "Yup. That's the lactic acid building up in your muscles. That means it's working"
KZ: "I'M LACTOSE INTOLERANT!!! I think I should stop!!"
Note: I'm not stupid enough to really get lactose and lactic confused. But friends, I would have done an-y-thing to stop the burn. Anything. One thing is absolutely clear: downhill skiing is nowhere in my future. Not that it is was really on the list of things I was dying to try, but remaining in a skiers squat for more than 5 seconds is my idea of punishment. Lindsey Vonn, you are a superhuman freak.
Next we moved on to wall sits. Friends, I have a longstanding relationship with wall sits. Once, when I was a little college cheerleader, we were doing wall sits for our conditioning and I sliced my elbow on a metal outlet cover and had to go get stitches and a shot and I was THRILLED because it meant I got out of the wall sits. There I was bleeding profusely and I was happy. THAT is how much I hate wall sits. I began to spell (See entry: Counting is so 2009) the name of every friend I have every had in my life: J-U-L-I-E, R-E-N-E-E, K-A-R-E-N, J-E-N-N, J-E-N-N-Y, -J-E-N-N-I-F-E-R (Wow, do I know a lot of Jenn's or what!). After a more names, I couldn't even speak. The burn was winning. After a few seconds of silence Bryan asked:
BW: Who's name are you spelling now?
KZ: G-O-D
If life was fair, one wall sit would be all it would take to get legs like Jennifer Aniston. But alas, it is not. But I did it! I didn't quit!! I cried and I whined (I may have even screamed), but I did not quit!
At the end of session 1, Bryan instructed me to do 20 minutes of cardio. But before I could take one step towards my beloved Precor 100i, he said that I need to do the Stairmaster to complete the lower body workout. Now, if you did not just think to yourself, "Oh! That poor girl! What has she done to deserve that?!?" then clearly you do not know what a StairMASTER is.
THIS is a Stairmaster:
I tried everything to get out of it.
KZ: "I'm scared of heights!"
BW: "It's about 2ft. high. Get on"
KZ: "I have vertigo."
BW: "What's that?"
**** Crickets ****
KZ: "I am morally and ethically opposed to anything with the word 'master' in it"
BW: "Get on."
I stopped for a break every 5 minutes. And I was on a low speed! But if a machine can make even your forearms sweat after 5 minutes, it must be working. And I have to admit, my buns felt a bit more steel-ish after I got off.
Day 2: Core
Act I.
BW: "Now you're gonna go in a Wonder Woman position and lift your arms and legs like you're flying"
KZ: "Technically, Wonder Woman didn't fly. She sat in an invisible jet. So, can I just practice sitting?"
BW: "No."
Act II.
KZ: "How many more do I have to do?"
BW: "Go until I say stop"
KZ: "But I need to know what to spell!"
BW: "Go for the alphabet"
Act III.
KZ: "You know, I totally understand if you want to stop and go home to your . . . "
BW: "No. Keep going"
KZ: ". . . baby"
KZ attempts fake tears for sympathy. It is not successful.
Day 3: Arms
KZ: "I can't lift anymore"
BW: "Yes, you can"
KZ: "I caaaaaannnnnnn'ttttt" (whining really is an artform if done correctly)
BW: "Just try it"
I did it !!!!! Success!!!! Screaming "King Kong ain't got nothin' on me!" is considered. Then reconsidered.
My arms feel like Gumby and I have BLISTERS. BLISTERS!!!! I haven't had blisters since my monkey bar days. I have my first official war wound from all of this. Guess it's time to get lifting gloves. You know the people in the gym who have lifting gloves. They are usually the badasses. Woo-hoo! I'm on my way to being a badass. Wonder if they have lifting gloves with Hello Kitty on them?
One of the great things about Bryan is that he is an educator and a nurturer. Maybe it's that dad instinct going into overdrive but every exercise came with a mini-lesson. I learned what muscle group I was working, why I was working it, and how it will help me in everyday activities. I wonder if he could show me some exercises to do in preparation for the semi-annual sale at Fred Segal. Just try to take those leggings out of my hand THIS time actress-who-shall-not-be-named, Just try! I'll get you my pretty! Muah-hahahahaha!
I have to say that Bryan gives a whole new meaning to the word dedication. Five days into fatherhood and he's back, giving me his full attention. If he can make it in, then I really don't have any excuse. I'm going to try to remember that every time I try to convince myself that a new episode of America's Next Top Model is reason enough to not go to the gym.
Monday, July 19, 2010
GOOOAAAAAAALLLLLLLL!!!!!!
As I mentioned in a mobile post, Saturday I tried a Latin Fusion aerobics class. This was my first group fitness class of any kind since '08. I used to be the aerobics class queen (not to mention a former cheerleader and dancer) but I was so nervous that those days were long gone that the idea of taking a class again was really giving me anxiety.
I was so afraid of being bad at it (dancing well is a stereotype we Black people actually like) that I forgot that this was for recreation aka FUN!!! There was no audience, no judges panel, no random bucket of water to pour down on me while I danced sexy in a chair - Who cares if I was terrible?? Answer: No one. I had to tell myself what I used to want to tell Paris Hilton when I would see her around Hollywood: Get over yourself! No one cares! And you know what. . . who cares if they did? I was going to try something new.
I took a deep breath and planted myself in the back of the room, far away from the exit. Was my subconscious trying to keep me from walking out if my nerves got the better of me? Or was it hoping that I would just blend into the wall if things got too humiliating? What if Shakira was wrong and my hips do, in fact, lie? Or worse, what if they don't say anything?
The instructor, Luis, looks JUST like Billy Blanks and he sounds like Antonio Bandaras. I'm serious. I don't know where he's from but he made everything sound exotic. I think I could listen to him recite the phone book and it was just what I needed to make me forget how nervous I was. Imagine Antonio Bandaras saying the following: "Grapevine", "mambo", "Shake it!". Add some music with bongos and lyrics in Espanol and you can't NOT (someone please go check on Mrs. Bowman. She may have just passed out with that double negative) smile and have . . . GASP . . . fun!
In 60 minutes I went from being scared stiff to shaking it likeShakira Beyonce Britney . . . . well, somebody different than the scared girl that walked in.
I did it. I tried something new. And I did have fun. Was I perfect? No. Is the Alvin Ailey company gonna come a knockin'? No. But I did score points with myself because I tried something that I would never have tried before. GOOOOOOOAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL (Was I reaching with that reference? Who cares. How many other opportunities am I going to get to quote Telemundo futbol announcer, Andres Cantor? Seriously)
Anyone care to join me for kickboxing class Tuesday night? I'll be the girl in the back of the room, far away from the exit.
I was so afraid of being bad at it (dancing well is a stereotype we Black people actually like) that I forgot that this was for recreation aka FUN!!! There was no audience, no judges panel, no random bucket of water to pour down on me while I danced sexy in a chair - Who cares if I was terrible?? Answer: No one. I had to tell myself what I used to want to tell Paris Hilton when I would see her around Hollywood: Get over yourself! No one cares! And you know what. . . who cares if they did? I was going to try something new.
I took a deep breath and planted myself in the back of the room, far away from the exit. Was my subconscious trying to keep me from walking out if my nerves got the better of me? Or was it hoping that I would just blend into the wall if things got too humiliating? What if Shakira was wrong and my hips do, in fact, lie? Or worse, what if they don't say anything?
The instructor, Luis, looks JUST like Billy Blanks and he sounds like Antonio Bandaras. I'm serious. I don't know where he's from but he made everything sound exotic. I think I could listen to him recite the phone book and it was just what I needed to make me forget how nervous I was. Imagine Antonio Bandaras saying the following: "Grapevine", "mambo", "Shake it!". Add some music with bongos and lyrics in Espanol and you can't NOT (someone please go check on Mrs. Bowman. She may have just passed out with that double negative) smile and have . . . GASP . . . fun!
In 60 minutes I went from being scared stiff to shaking it like
I did it. I tried something new. And I did have fun. Was I perfect? No. Is the Alvin Ailey company gonna come a knockin'? No. But I did score points with myself because I tried something that I would never have tried before. GOOOOOOOAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL (Was I reaching with that reference? Who cares. How many other opportunities am I going to get to quote Telemundo futbol announcer, Andres Cantor? Seriously)
Anyone care to join me for kickboxing class Tuesday night? I'll be the girl in the back of the room, far away from the exit.
A gold star for my efforts?
Still catching up from last week. I thought by now I'd have the hang of this write/ work-out/ work thing but I'm apparently mastering it as well as the Stairmaster (that will be a really funny comment later. . . you'll see).
To completely catch up I have to rewind to Friday and my weekly meeting with Dr. Josh. The meeting was brief because I accidentally schedule my appointment when I was supposed to be working. Most docs would have instructed me to re-schedule. Not Dr. Josh - No, no - he made a "work call" (like a house call but at work). Now granted, we work in the same building . . . but still!
He looked over my food journal and gave me the thumbs-up in approval. I would have preferred a gold star or a "100%" written in red ink with a smiley face in the zeros but I'll take a thumbs up. I can't bring myself to tell him that I haven't cleaned out my car yet. That's just embarrassing at this point. It's just that something keeps coming up that keeps me from doing it. But I'm sure that's what Pigpen told the rest of the Peanuts gang when the subject of cleaning came up too. THIS WEEK IT SHALL BE DONE!!!
But I did tell 10 friends how much I respect them and admire them. Why did I do that and what does it have to do with getting into shape? you ask. Well, it's all about being the best me I can be. Eating healthy, treating my body better, being a better friend are all apples on the same tree in my opinion.
This week, I've decided that my "life" assignment is going to be to read a book. Nothing on the classics list or anything. I've already read most of the books on that list anyways. WHICH REMINDS ME. . . . . . Ahem, I must take this moment to say something I've been waiting to say for ten years - - - HOLDEN CAULFIELD, YOU ARE SO OVERRATED MY FRIEND! Back to what I was saying. . . life assignment, books. Why am I doing that and what does it have to do with getting into shape? you ask (FYI: you're kinda repetitive with the questions) Well, so many times in the past when I've gone on DIEts, I do what I like to call "cocooning". I do nothing but:
1. Workout
2. Think about working out
3. Talk about working out
4. Write about working out (ummmm. . . . pay no attention to that blog behind the curtain!!)
Then, in a few months time, I emerge a beautiful (cranky and starving) butterfly. But when I try to incorporate ordinary things back into my life, I'm at a complete loss of how to do it and keep up with obsessive behavior at the same time. I don't want to fall into the same bad habits. I want this new lifestyle to be PART of my life, not consume it.
So believe it or not, doing ordinary tasks is pretty extraordinary for me right now. I'm not cocooning. . . I'm living. I'm doing all of the things that I love to do: reading; going to the movies; picking fights with rude dog owners at the dog park; picking out my dream house on http://www.prudential.com/ (so I'm ready when I win the lotto); etc. WHILE working out and eating healthy. I'm really trying to take the "it's the journey not the destination" idea to heart. But I'll never be above getting a gold star for my efforts.
PS -- For my "nutritional" goal for the week, I am going to try a food I have never tried before. I'm not talking about anything those crazy people would try on that old reality show, Fear Factor (Side Note: I know a girl that went on that show and she won by chowing down on spleen, spine, and hairy snouts. DIS-GUS-TING). That is a DEFINITE NGH (see post: NGH). I'm talking something like roasted kale or a kumquat. Puh-lease! I'm the crazy lady who dresses her dog up in sweaters in winter. I'm not the crazy lady who would eat spleen or hairy snouts. My craziness is endearing. . . not revolting.
To completely catch up I have to rewind to Friday and my weekly meeting with Dr. Josh. The meeting was brief because I accidentally schedule my appointment when I was supposed to be working. Most docs would have instructed me to re-schedule. Not Dr. Josh - No, no - he made a "work call" (like a house call but at work). Now granted, we work in the same building . . . but still!
He looked over my food journal and gave me the thumbs-up in approval. I would have preferred a gold star or a "100%" written in red ink with a smiley face in the zeros but I'll take a thumbs up. I can't bring myself to tell him that I haven't cleaned out my car yet. That's just embarrassing at this point. It's just that something keeps coming up that keeps me from doing it. But I'm sure that's what Pigpen told the rest of the Peanuts gang when the subject of cleaning came up too. THIS WEEK IT SHALL BE DONE!!!
But I did tell 10 friends how much I respect them and admire them. Why did I do that and what does it have to do with getting into shape? you ask. Well, it's all about being the best me I can be. Eating healthy, treating my body better, being a better friend are all apples on the same tree in my opinion.
This week, I've decided that my "life" assignment is going to be to read a book. Nothing on the classics list or anything. I've already read most of the books on that list anyways. WHICH REMINDS ME. . . . . . Ahem, I must take this moment to say something I've been waiting to say for ten years - - - HOLDEN CAULFIELD, YOU ARE SO OVERRATED MY FRIEND! Back to what I was saying. . . life assignment, books. Why am I doing that and what does it have to do with getting into shape? you ask (FYI: you're kinda repetitive with the questions) Well, so many times in the past when I've gone on DIEts, I do what I like to call "cocooning". I do nothing but:
1. Workout
2. Think about working out
3. Talk about working out
4. Write about working out (ummmm. . . . pay no attention to that blog behind the curtain!!)
Then, in a few months time, I emerge a beautiful (cranky and starving) butterfly. But when I try to incorporate ordinary things back into my life, I'm at a complete loss of how to do it and keep up with obsessive behavior at the same time. I don't want to fall into the same bad habits. I want this new lifestyle to be PART of my life, not consume it.
So believe it or not, doing ordinary tasks is pretty extraordinary for me right now. I'm not cocooning. . . I'm living. I'm doing all of the things that I love to do: reading; going to the movies; picking fights with rude dog owners at the dog park; picking out my dream house on http://www.prudential.com/ (so I'm ready when I win the lotto); etc. WHILE working out and eating healthy. I'm really trying to take the "it's the journey not the destination" idea to heart. But I'll never be above getting a gold star for my efforts.
PS -- For my "nutritional" goal for the week, I am going to try a food I have never tried before. I'm not talking about anything those crazy people would try on that old reality show, Fear Factor (Side Note: I know a girl that went on that show and she won by chowing down on spleen, spine, and hairy snouts. DIS-GUS-TING). That is a DEFINITE NGH (see post: NGH). I'm talking something like roasted kale or a kumquat. Puh-lease! I'm the crazy lady who dresses her dog up in sweaters in winter. I'm not the crazy lady who would eat spleen or hairy snouts. My craziness is endearing. . . not revolting.
Saturday, July 17, 2010
. . . when the cupboard is bare & my budget is $6
How is it already Saturday?? Did I really go an entire week without a post?? Oops. . . . my bad.
This has been a very interesting week. This Friday was "pay day" meaning Monday-Thursday were extremely tight. "How tight?" you ask. Let's just say that I checked the pockets of all of my jeans, all of my purses and under the couch for coins and dollars. Since moving to N.C., while I have gotten bigger and bigger, my wallet is looking downright runway model skinny these days. Which brings me to the subject of my post: Sometimes it's not a state-of-mind that makes eating healthy seemingly impossible, $$$ can also play a huge part. How can you eat healthy on a budget???
I've been looking on the Internet for tips on eating healthy on a budget. It seems like Rule Numero Uno is "Plan, Plan, and Plan ahead". Take the time to plan your meals ahead of time so that when you get to the grocery store. . . . blah, blah, blah. We've read this a million times. I hope that one day I am organized enough to be THAT girl in the grocery store to walk in with a monogrammed coupon case and a grocery list that could be easily confused with Martha Stewart's, while cartoon birds flutter around me while I hum a happy tune and twirl in my Stepford wife dress.
Chirping birds, humming and twirling aside, I'm pretty good about buying my chicken breasts, brown rice, frozen veggies, etc.. . . AFTER PAYDAY. That's not too hard. What IS hard is finding something to eat that doesn't require pulling up to a drive through window on those 2-3 days BEFORE payday when the cupboard is bare and my budget is about $6 . . . or less
Now, we all know we can get a "Five dolla - five dolla - five dolla foot-long" from Subway. But since I'm not eating bread at the moment, that is not an option. Here are just a few ideas that got me through the lean days without having to deviate from my food options.
1. Celery ($1.99), Starkist Tuna Garlic and Herb packet ($2.35 for one packet): take the tuna and pack it in the middle of a few cut pieces of celery. It's already flavored so it doesn't need anything else to be tasty (not just edible. . . but tasty).
2. Edamame ($2.50 or less). If you ever have a french fry craving and feel the Golden Arches luring you into their trans-fat filled web, hit the grocery store for some yummy Edamame goodness. If you've never heard of them, they are green soybeans in the pod that are picked before ripening (according to Wikipedia). You eat them like you would peanuts in the shell or sunflower seeds. They are perfect for movie nights instead of buttered popcorn. You can find them in the veggie frozen section. No. . . they aren't a meal. But they got me through the movie Shutter Island without taking a bite of popcorn, so I had to give them a "shout out" so to speak.
3. Eggs ($1.99 for one dozen) and spinach ($1.25 in frozen section). I like them scrambled together personally.
I'm sure some of you may have 30 more ideas of how to eat healthy for under $5*. Yeay for you. But in case you didn't. . . hope my little ideas got you thinking. Here's a website that I found that's really inspired me and my grocery store selections: http://www.5dollardinners.com/
On a final note, while it should be an oxymoron that the impoverished areas of the country are also the fattest... it's not. Fast food is cheap food but FAsT food is mostly FAT (see what I did there?). There are options besides a cheeseburger and fries when you only have quarters and dimes in your wallet. Trust me, I paid for my lunch of cucumber ($1.29), brown rice ($1.49) and a banana (.69 for one) off of change I found in my car (Guess it came in handy that I haven't cleaned my car out after all!)
* I did not forget about Lean Cuisine, Healthy Choice, Weight Watchers frozen dinners. While those are low on calories, they are filled with (tasty?) chemicals and sodium. My fingers blow up like the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man after eating one.
This has been a very interesting week. This Friday was "pay day" meaning Monday-Thursday were extremely tight. "How tight?" you ask. Let's just say that I checked the pockets of all of my jeans, all of my purses and under the couch for coins and dollars. Since moving to N.C., while I have gotten bigger and bigger, my wallet is looking downright runway model skinny these days. Which brings me to the subject of my post: Sometimes it's not a state-of-mind that makes eating healthy seemingly impossible, $$$ can also play a huge part. How can you eat healthy on a budget???
I've been looking on the Internet for tips on eating healthy on a budget. It seems like Rule Numero Uno is "Plan, Plan, and Plan ahead". Take the time to plan your meals ahead of time so that when you get to the grocery store. . . . blah, blah, blah. We've read this a million times. I hope that one day I am organized enough to be THAT girl in the grocery store to walk in with a monogrammed coupon case and a grocery list that could be easily confused with Martha Stewart's, while cartoon birds flutter around me while I hum a happy tune and twirl in my Stepford wife dress.
Chirping birds, humming and twirling aside, I'm pretty good about buying my chicken breasts, brown rice, frozen veggies, etc.. . . AFTER PAYDAY. That's not too hard. What IS hard is finding something to eat that doesn't require pulling up to a drive through window on those 2-3 days BEFORE payday when the cupboard is bare and my budget is about $6 . . . or less
Now, we all know we can get a "Five dolla - five dolla - five dolla foot-long" from Subway. But since I'm not eating bread at the moment, that is not an option. Here are just a few ideas that got me through the lean days without having to deviate from my food options.
1. Celery ($1.99), Starkist Tuna Garlic and Herb packet ($2.35 for one packet): take the tuna and pack it in the middle of a few cut pieces of celery. It's already flavored so it doesn't need anything else to be tasty (not just edible. . . but tasty).
2. Edamame ($2.50 or less). If you ever have a french fry craving and feel the Golden Arches luring you into their trans-fat filled web, hit the grocery store for some yummy Edamame goodness. If you've never heard of them, they are green soybeans in the pod that are picked before ripening (according to Wikipedia). You eat them like you would peanuts in the shell or sunflower seeds. They are perfect for movie nights instead of buttered popcorn. You can find them in the veggie frozen section. No. . . they aren't a meal. But they got me through the movie Shutter Island without taking a bite of popcorn, so I had to give them a "shout out" so to speak.
3. Eggs ($1.99 for one dozen) and spinach ($1.25 in frozen section). I like them scrambled together personally.
I'm sure some of you may have 30 more ideas of how to eat healthy for under $5*. Yeay for you. But in case you didn't. . . hope my little ideas got you thinking. Here's a website that I found that's really inspired me and my grocery store selections: http://www.5dollardinners.com/
On a final note, while it should be an oxymoron that the impoverished areas of the country are also the fattest... it's not. Fast food is cheap food but FAsT food is mostly FAT (see what I did there?). There are options besides a cheeseburger and fries when you only have quarters and dimes in your wallet. Trust me, I paid for my lunch of cucumber ($1.29), brown rice ($1.49) and a banana (.69 for one) off of change I found in my car (Guess it came in handy that I haven't cleaned my car out after all!)
* I did not forget about Lean Cuisine, Healthy Choice, Weight Watchers frozen dinners. While those are low on calories, they are filled with (tasty?) chemicals and sodium. My fingers blow up like the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man after eating one.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
I'll always be part cynic
Week 3
Day 18
Today I threw a bag of York Pieces (like Reece's Pieces but York Peppermint Patty) across the room. Seriously, this candy has been in our house for a month. Is it the same bag? Do new bags keep showing up? Is it that there's more than one bag?? I do not understand how this candy is constantly under my nose, taunting me. It's starting to irritate me. Yeah, yeah, yeah psych majors - go ahead and analyze me for frequently giving anthropomorphic (yes, me know big words) qualities to food. Say what you will, I think it's just because the McNugget Buddies and the California Raisins really messed with my head as a child.
I can't believe this week is already half over and I almost 3 weeks into this fitness journey (technically I started blogging 6/28, but I didn't start training with the trainers until 6/28). Time is flying by.
As I mentioned in a previous post, my "life" assignment this week was to send 10 positive words of encouragement and praise to friends. So far I have 8. It may seem like a silly assignment but it really isn't. Making people feel good, makes me feel good. When I feel good, I have more energy and more motivation to keep going with my own goals. Positive energy is contagious. Plus, I believe that improvement on the outside only happens when there is improvement on the inside. So, I'm making efforts to be a better me.
Don't misunderstand, cynicism is kind of my trademark and I don't think I could completely let it all go. Who would I be without it? I mean who would Whoopi Goldberg be without her signature dreads? Who would Bob Dole be if he didn't refer to himself in the third person? Who would Joan Rivers be without her plastic surgeon? I'll always be part cynic. But my goal is to be a cynic with a heart of gold.
I can't wait to post about my training sessions this week. While they are staying challenging and physically demanding, I am getting to the point mentally where I don't think I will die in the middle of a session. I actually look forward to my morning workouts now, whereas before just the idea of waking up before 11am seemed like a punishment. When my workouts are over, I feel like I accomplished something which is motivation to accomplish other tasks, large or small, for the rest of the day.
Friday, I may even let my trainer, Bryan W, take my measurements and weigh me. If you hadn't noticed, I've been avoiding the scale like the plague. I don't know, I guess I don't want to get discouraged if it's not enough, or overzealous if it is. I'm kind of nervous to fall off the tightrope I'm walking right now. I feel like I have a perfect balance of healthy eating and exercising RIGHT NOW, but I'm scared to get overconfident. My past includes periods of working out for hours on end like a manic AND sitting and doing nothing but eat. I don't want anything to rock the boat. I like the progress I've made, but I have to admit. . . . I don't quite trust myself with all these new, good habits. The good habits aren't quite branded into my subconscious yet.
Day 18
Today I threw a bag of York Pieces (like Reece's Pieces but York Peppermint Patty) across the room. Seriously, this candy has been in our house for a month. Is it the same bag? Do new bags keep showing up? Is it that there's more than one bag?? I do not understand how this candy is constantly under my nose, taunting me. It's starting to irritate me. Yeah, yeah, yeah psych majors - go ahead and analyze me for frequently giving anthropomorphic (yes, me know big words) qualities to food. Say what you will, I think it's just because the McNugget Buddies and the California Raisins really messed with my head as a child.
I can't believe this week is already half over and I almost 3 weeks into this fitness journey (technically I started blogging 6/28, but I didn't start training with the trainers until 6/28). Time is flying by.
As I mentioned in a previous post, my "life" assignment this week was to send 10 positive words of encouragement and praise to friends. So far I have 8. It may seem like a silly assignment but it really isn't. Making people feel good, makes me feel good. When I feel good, I have more energy and more motivation to keep going with my own goals. Positive energy is contagious. Plus, I believe that improvement on the outside only happens when there is improvement on the inside. So, I'm making efforts to be a better me.
Don't misunderstand, cynicism is kind of my trademark and I don't think I could completely let it all go. Who would I be without it? I mean who would Whoopi Goldberg be without her signature dreads? Who would Bob Dole be if he didn't refer to himself in the third person? Who would Joan Rivers be without her plastic surgeon? I'll always be part cynic. But my goal is to be a cynic with a heart of gold.
I can't wait to post about my training sessions this week. While they are staying challenging and physically demanding, I am getting to the point mentally where I don't think I will die in the middle of a session. I actually look forward to my morning workouts now, whereas before just the idea of waking up before 11am seemed like a punishment. When my workouts are over, I feel like I accomplished something which is motivation to accomplish other tasks, large or small, for the rest of the day.
Friday, I may even let my trainer, Bryan W, take my measurements and weigh me. If you hadn't noticed, I've been avoiding the scale like the plague. I don't know, I guess I don't want to get discouraged if it's not enough, or overzealous if it is. I'm kind of nervous to fall off the tightrope I'm walking right now. I feel like I have a perfect balance of healthy eating and exercising RIGHT NOW, but I'm scared to get overconfident. My past includes periods of working out for hours on end like a manic AND sitting and doing nothing but eat. I don't want anything to rock the boat. I like the progress I've made, but I have to admit. . . . I don't quite trust myself with all these new, good habits. The good habits aren't quite branded into my subconscious yet.
Monday, July 12, 2010
. . . I'll bring the whine
Location: North Ridge Rapid Fitness
Trainer: Jenn W.
Week: 2
As I mentioned previously, each week I'm going to be passed to a different trainer at Rapid Fitness to get the full Rapid Fitness experience. Last week (like I said, I know I'm behind and it's LeBron's fault), Jenn W. was up! First of all, she is one of the cutest human beings on the planet. I don't think she could be any cuter if the Disney Imagineering Dept. created her themselves.
When she told me that she was going to be my week #2 trainer, I told her to bring the cheese, because I've got the whine (although clearly I've got plenty of "cheese" given that old joke). Being only my second week back in the gym, I was quite positive I wasn't going to be all G.I. Jane-like with a "Bring on the pain" attitude. Umm no. I'm still the girl who requests first-aid attention with a hangnail. I am not a hard ass. As might as well fess up in the beginning.
At the beginning of our first session she explained that her strategy was to incorporate plyometric moves (definition: exercises designed to produce fast, powerful movements) or as I like to call them - Satan's invention, along with weight training. So basically, any hopes that this was going to be a relaxing session vanished.
Now, I'm not sure if she planned it this way but it was as though Jenn read my mind as to all my stubborn "problem areas" and that's what we worked on the three days I trained with her. Day one we hit the back. More specifically, that area that tends to rise above your bra strap like Play-Doh when you squeeze it in your hand. We did back exercise after back exercise with flying, leaping and power squatting mixed in to completely exhaust me. Hope you enjoyed your stay, Backfat! Good riddance!
I can only describe Day two with two words: Insane Burpees. Now, you can find the definition of a regular old Burpee anywhere on the Internet. Wikipedia describes a burpee as an exercise where you:
1. Begin in standing position
2. Drop into squat position with hands on the floor in front of you
3. Kick your feet back into push-up position
4. Immediately return your feet to squat position
5. Leap up as high as you can from the squat position with your arms overhead
That's a simple 'ole regular burpee. Now while I can't describe in detail what an Insane Burpee is (I would hope that Jenn seeks to trademark it), I can give you the recipe:
Take regular burpee
Add 2 parts NFL training camp
1 part ROTC Bootcamp
a dash of "Girl, are you crazy?"
Blend and serve.
Seriously, this exercise worked every muscle in my entire body. Arms, legs, abs . . . tear ducts. Do you know how many I can do? 5. Do you know how many I can do without crying? 3. If every American did 5 Insane Burpees a day, I'm pretty sure our obesity problem would pretty much disappear. A slight hyperbole? Sure. But not by much in my non-medical expert, science failer since 6th grade opinion. As much as I curse them, I'm obsessed with them. I do 5 a day now. After 30 days of Insane Burpees, I may just cut the sleeves off of every shirt I own just to show off my "guns" (I didn't make it through that last sentence without laughing either. . . so don't feel bad).
In addition to Insane Burpies, Jenn gave me a series of exercises that attacked yet another problem area: The dreaded batwing (the saggy arm syndrome). Now, I had kind of accepted batwings as my fate. My parting gift from the Twenty-something club. But thanks to Jenn's workout, I am on my way to being able to wave in a tank top without fear of slapping someone in the face.
Day 3 was the spare tire and the bootie. I'm not going to lie, creating the spare tire was an absolute PLEASURE. I was living a world where I had seconds, and sometimes thirds. A world where the question wasn't IF I was going to have dessert, but WHICH dessert I was going to shove down my gullet. A world where Cheetos can be a breakfast, lunch and dinner food. Breaking the spare tire down is going to be swinging the pendulum in the other direction: it is the opposite of fun. My abs were burning. I spelled (See: Counting is so 2009) every word I could think of to distract myself from the burn. I'm coming Elizabeth! Let the whining commence. I am so not a trainer's dream client. By my last set, I was visualizing a cookie cake on my knees, and I had to lift up to take a bite. When did I turn into the cartoon character Cathy? Ack!
Jenn, the strapless dress that was purchased in 2008 and has only been worn once to this day, thanks you sincerely. Those trouble spots have kept it in the back of my closet with no glimpse of sunlight. Perhaps, if I keep up with your exercises it will see daylight once again!!!
Trainer: Jenn W.
Week: 2
As I mentioned previously, each week I'm going to be passed to a different trainer at Rapid Fitness to get the full Rapid Fitness experience. Last week (like I said, I know I'm behind and it's LeBron's fault), Jenn W. was up! First of all, she is one of the cutest human beings on the planet. I don't think she could be any cuter if the Disney Imagineering Dept. created her themselves.
When she told me that she was going to be my week #2 trainer, I told her to bring the cheese, because I've got the whine (although clearly I've got plenty of "cheese" given that old joke). Being only my second week back in the gym, I was quite positive I wasn't going to be all G.I. Jane-like with a "Bring on the pain" attitude. Umm no. I'm still the girl who requests first-aid attention with a hangnail. I am not a hard ass. As might as well fess up in the beginning.
At the beginning of our first session she explained that her strategy was to incorporate plyometric moves (definition: exercises designed to produce fast, powerful movements) or as I like to call them - Satan's invention, along with weight training. So basically, any hopes that this was going to be a relaxing session vanished.
Now, I'm not sure if she planned it this way but it was as though Jenn read my mind as to all my stubborn "problem areas" and that's what we worked on the three days I trained with her. Day one we hit the back. More specifically, that area that tends to rise above your bra strap like Play-Doh when you squeeze it in your hand. We did back exercise after back exercise with flying, leaping and power squatting mixed in to completely exhaust me. Hope you enjoyed your stay, Backfat! Good riddance!
I can only describe Day two with two words: Insane Burpees. Now, you can find the definition of a regular old Burpee anywhere on the Internet. Wikipedia describes a burpee as an exercise where you:
1. Begin in standing position
2. Drop into squat position with hands on the floor in front of you
3. Kick your feet back into push-up position
4. Immediately return your feet to squat position
5. Leap up as high as you can from the squat position with your arms overhead
That's a simple 'ole regular burpee. Now while I can't describe in detail what an Insane Burpee is (I would hope that Jenn seeks to trademark it), I can give you the recipe:
Take regular burpee
Add 2 parts NFL training camp
1 part ROTC Bootcamp
a dash of "Girl, are you crazy?"
Blend and serve.
Seriously, this exercise worked every muscle in my entire body. Arms, legs, abs . . . tear ducts. Do you know how many I can do? 5. Do you know how many I can do without crying? 3. If every American did 5 Insane Burpees a day, I'm pretty sure our obesity problem would pretty much disappear. A slight hyperbole? Sure. But not by much in my non-medical expert, science failer since 6th grade opinion. As much as I curse them, I'm obsessed with them. I do 5 a day now. After 30 days of Insane Burpees, I may just cut the sleeves off of every shirt I own just to show off my "guns" (I didn't make it through that last sentence without laughing either. . . so don't feel bad).
In addition to Insane Burpies, Jenn gave me a series of exercises that attacked yet another problem area: The dreaded batwing (the saggy arm syndrome). Now, I had kind of accepted batwings as my fate. My parting gift from the Twenty-something club. But thanks to Jenn's workout, I am on my way to being able to wave in a tank top without fear of slapping someone in the face.
Day 3 was the spare tire and the bootie. I'm not going to lie, creating the spare tire was an absolute PLEASURE. I was living a world where I had seconds, and sometimes thirds. A world where the question wasn't IF I was going to have dessert, but WHICH dessert I was going to shove down my gullet. A world where Cheetos can be a breakfast, lunch and dinner food. Breaking the spare tire down is going to be swinging the pendulum in the other direction: it is the opposite of fun. My abs were burning. I spelled (See: Counting is so 2009) every word I could think of to distract myself from the burn. I'm coming Elizabeth! Let the whining commence. I am so not a trainer's dream client. By my last set, I was visualizing a cookie cake on my knees, and I had to lift up to take a bite. When did I turn into the cartoon character Cathy? Ack!
Jenn, the strapless dress that was purchased in 2008 and has only been worn once to this day, thanks you sincerely. Those trouble spots have kept it in the back of my closet with no glimpse of sunlight. Perhaps, if I keep up with your exercises it will see daylight once again!!!
Yes Kai, there IS a Santa Claus
Friday I had my weekly appointment with Dr. Josh. Yes, I'm a few days behind. I'm going to blame LeBron James. Seems as though everyone in Ohio is blaming him for their problems this week. Why can't I?
Dr. Josh asked me how I was doing and how the week went. Figuring he wouldn't be that fascinated to hear about my eyebrow waxing debacle from earlier in the week (they are NOT supposed to look like two commas, Evil Eyebrow Lady), I answered with an eloquent "not bad".
I thenturned in my homework showed him my weekly food journal. After a few minutes he said, "So. . . you're not eating enough". Come again? Are we talking about the same food journal? He pointed at an entry where I had two eggs and a pear for breakfast. "The eggs are about 140 calories and the pear is probably about 100 calories. . . you needed about 100 extra calories in this entry."
He could have just as well said 'Hey, everyone was just kidding the past 22 years, Santa Claus IS real! Yes Kai, there IS a Santa Claus!' and I don't think I would have been any happier. I get to eat MORE?? MORE??? For years, I went on this diet or that diet and usually went to bed hungry and cranky and woke up hungrier and crankier. Now, I'm on a meal plan where not only am I grazing pretty consistently throughout the day, but I get to eat MORE than I thought?? Fetch me some penny loafers! I feel the need to do a King of Pop "Woooo!!" and obligatory snapping knee kick thing!!!
Dr. Josh then asked me how this past week went. As far as my health assignment from last week, to make a meal, I give myself an A+!!! I made not one, but two meals. Nothing fancy, mind you. But I reckon (I've always wanted to say that) I made two pretty fabulous dinners.
Now my life assignment from last week, washing my car, was another story. While I've told the procrastinator inside me to go away, it seems to not really be in the mood to do that right now. . . maybe tomorrow. So washing the car stays on as a life assignment. In addition to that, I am adding something new. I'm picking 10 random Facebook friends and telling them how much I applaud them for whatever it is they are pursuing. Achieving your dreams isn't easy. Everyone has those days where you feel like giving up, put the covers over your head and go back to sleep. I have received an amazing amount of support from friends, co-workers and even strangers since starting this blog. And every little bit of encouragement has helped me tremendously. I want to give that back to other people. So this week I'm going to verbally pat 10 friends on the back. . . . and wash the car.
Other than that, my week has been ok. I didn't cheat on my eating plan. In fact, I'm beginning to resent the doughnuts, pasta salad, candy, etc. sitting in the pantry. In the past when I've gone on DIEts, I've purged my surroundings of anything remotely unhealthy (secret candy stash in the sock drawer - gone, secret chip stash over the fridge - gone). Then when presented with temptation (walking past Sprinkles Cupcakes in Beverly Hills, for example), I'd fail, b/c I hadn't practiced restraint. I'm not advising everyone to go out and buy a dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts and just stare at them to build up your tolerance to temptation. That may not work for you. But in my case, it's working because I'm getting angry, literally angry at the foods that try to tempt me and hold me back from my goal. It's like the doughnuts, ice cream and cookies are the Mean Girls and I'm the nerdy girl with a heart of gold who's finally learning to stand up for herself (I wonder who would play me in the movie version!).
I'm not saying that I will never, until the end of time, have another doughnut or piece of pie (Marie Callender will always be my homegirl!). That's just not realistic. But am I salivating thinking about having a doughnut or a piece of pie now? Not really. At least not today. And that's a start!
P.S. - I don't know what's going on with the paragraph spacing right now on Blogger. It's acting weirdo. I'm going to blame LeBron
P.P.S - Yesterday, I mentioned the fantabulous Ollie and Jerry song, "There's No Stoppin Us" in a mobile post. Since I don't have a relevant picture to post for today, please enjoy the video below. You're Welcome.
Dr. Josh asked me how I was doing and how the week went. Figuring he wouldn't be that fascinated to hear about my eyebrow waxing debacle from earlier in the week (they are NOT supposed to look like two commas, Evil Eyebrow Lady), I answered with an eloquent "not bad".
I then
He could have just as well said 'Hey, everyone was just kidding the past 22 years, Santa Claus IS real! Yes Kai, there IS a Santa Claus!' and I don't think I would have been any happier. I get to eat MORE?? MORE??? For years, I went on this diet or that diet and usually went to bed hungry and cranky and woke up hungrier and crankier. Now, I'm on a meal plan where not only am I grazing pretty consistently throughout the day, but I get to eat MORE than I thought?? Fetch me some penny loafers! I feel the need to do a King of Pop "Woooo!!" and obligatory snapping knee kick thing!!!
Dr. Josh then asked me how this past week went. As far as my health assignment from last week, to make a meal, I give myself an A+!!! I made not one, but two meals. Nothing fancy, mind you. But I reckon (I've always wanted to say that) I made two pretty fabulous dinners.
Now my life assignment from last week, washing my car, was another story. While I've told the procrastinator inside me to go away, it seems to not really be in the mood to do that right now. . . maybe tomorrow. So washing the car stays on as a life assignment. In addition to that, I am adding something new. I'm picking 10 random Facebook friends and telling them how much I applaud them for whatever it is they are pursuing. Achieving your dreams isn't easy. Everyone has those days where you feel like giving up, put the covers over your head and go back to sleep. I have received an amazing amount of support from friends, co-workers and even strangers since starting this blog. And every little bit of encouragement has helped me tremendously. I want to give that back to other people. So this week I'm going to verbally pat 10 friends on the back. . . . and wash the car.
Other than that, my week has been ok. I didn't cheat on my eating plan. In fact, I'm beginning to resent the doughnuts, pasta salad, candy, etc. sitting in the pantry. In the past when I've gone on DIEts, I've purged my surroundings of anything remotely unhealthy (secret candy stash in the sock drawer - gone, secret chip stash over the fridge - gone). Then when presented with temptation (walking past Sprinkles Cupcakes in Beverly Hills, for example), I'd fail, b/c I hadn't practiced restraint. I'm not advising everyone to go out and buy a dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts and just stare at them to build up your tolerance to temptation. That may not work for you. But in my case, it's working because I'm getting angry, literally angry at the foods that try to tempt me and hold me back from my goal. It's like the doughnuts, ice cream and cookies are the Mean Girls and I'm the nerdy girl with a heart of gold who's finally learning to stand up for herself (I wonder who would play me in the movie version!).
I'm not saying that I will never, until the end of time, have another doughnut or piece of pie (Marie Callender will always be my homegirl!). That's just not realistic. But am I salivating thinking about having a doughnut or a piece of pie now? Not really. At least not today. And that's a start!
P.S. - I don't know what's going on with the paragraph spacing right now on Blogger. It's acting weirdo. I'm going to blame LeBron
P.P.S - Yesterday, I mentioned the fantabulous Ollie and Jerry song, "There's No Stoppin Us" in a mobile post. Since I don't have a relevant picture to post for today, please enjoy the video below. You're Welcome.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Saturday, July 10, 2010
NGH
I've been thinking about something I said a few posts back. I said, "I don't like trying new things." That is definitely a true statement. Question is: do I WANT that to be the truth?
There are a few things that I am perfectly satisfied putting in the Never Gonna Happen (NGH) category. Camping in a tent, for instance, is NGH. The bugs have their part of the planet and I have mine . . . and never the twain shall meet (Yeah that's right, I just quoted Kipling. Don't act so surprised)
Singing in public. Another example of a NGH. But that is really for the sake of everyone so that shouldn't really count.
But aside from those things, I don't really have any excuse. I shouldn't be so afraid to try new things.
A friend and I were talking about my favorite big toothed, positive thinking, public speaker - Tony Robbins a few days ago. My favorite quote of his is:
If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten.
I never try new things so I stick with the same old things & then: give up, get bored, overeat, gain weight. It's a cycle that's more predictable than the theme of a Lifetime Original Movie ("Men are Jerks" for $800, Alex).
So, I'm going to come out of my comfort zone and try something new. I'm thinking one of the Group Fitness Classes this week. Not the typical Step or Body Pump, but maybe Latin Fusion or Zumba. I saw these people shaking their booties this morning when I was wheezing away on the elliptical. They were having so much fun. And isn't that what this is all about? Not just living life, but living your best life (that's a total Oprah-ism) aka a life filled with JOY and FUN!
I want this to work long term. I want to euthanize my old habits. This journey isn't a chore, it's a privilege! I'm lucky to have today! Might as well take advantage of it. So bring on the new. . . even if I look like an idiot.
Oh yeah. . . . any sport where a ball might even remotely come into contact with my nose - - - NGH.
There are a few things that I am perfectly satisfied putting in the Never Gonna Happen (NGH) category. Camping in a tent, for instance, is NGH. The bugs have their part of the planet and I have mine . . . and never the twain shall meet (Yeah that's right, I just quoted Kipling. Don't act so surprised)
Singing in public. Another example of a NGH. But that is really for the sake of everyone so that shouldn't really count.
But aside from those things, I don't really have any excuse. I shouldn't be so afraid to try new things.
A friend and I were talking about my favorite big toothed, positive thinking, public speaker - Tony Robbins a few days ago. My favorite quote of his is:
If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten.
I never try new things so I stick with the same old things & then: give up, get bored, overeat, gain weight. It's a cycle that's more predictable than the theme of a Lifetime Original Movie ("Men are Jerks" for $800, Alex).
So, I'm going to come out of my comfort zone and try something new. I'm thinking one of the Group Fitness Classes this week. Not the typical Step or Body Pump, but maybe Latin Fusion or Zumba. I saw these people shaking their booties this morning when I was wheezing away on the elliptical. They were having so much fun. And isn't that what this is all about? Not just living life, but living your best life (that's a total Oprah-ism) aka a life filled with JOY and FUN!
I want this to work long term. I want to euthanize my old habits. This journey isn't a chore, it's a privilege! I'm lucky to have today! Might as well take advantage of it. So bring on the new. . . even if I look like an idiot.
Oh yeah. . . . any sport where a ball might even remotely come into contact with my nose - - - NGH.
Friday, July 9, 2010
Counting is so 2009
Week: 2/ Day: 12
So far, I've had seven training sessions (which I'll get to a bit later today) since embarking on this fitness journey and I've come to the conclusion that I am a wimp. Not a physical strength wimp but a mental wimp. When the going gets tough, I want to lay down and take a nap. Laziness is extremely tempting. In Nerd-uguese, if laziness were a gold ring, just call me Frodo. I know I have to get rid of the laziness, but it's calling to me, yelling at me: Sit back, grab some Funyuns and stare at the clouds. . . my precious!
My battle against the laziness is extremely evident when it comes to pushing through the burn. And when the burn starts on rep 2 of 15 during something like bicep curls, it's easy to persuade yourself to only do 13 reps (or *cough* five *cough*). I mean, I have no loyalty to 15. What has 15 done for me? 8, on the other hand, has done a lot for me. So, maybe I'll just do 8 reps.
I quickly realized that I was approaching all the exercises like a negotiation. If Larry or (my trainer from this week) Jenn wanted me to do 10 reps, I'd shoot for 7. . . or 3. 'Cause 3's a magic number! When it's 3 - you can see - it's a magic number!! Damn you ,Schoolhouse Rock, and your catchy tunes that get stuck in my head!
I came to the conclusion that counting reps was simply not going to work. It's just too easy to compromise, to give up. I had to find a way to get through these reps, to resist the laziness. I found my solution in spelling. that's right s-p-e-l-l-i-n-g reps instead of counting them! I started spelling anything that popped into my head. If I had twenty crunches to do, I'd spell out a whole sentence like: I-n-e-e-d-t-o-s-h-a-v-e-m-y-l-e-g-s. So it's not twenty letters exactly. That's not the point. The point is, by the time I'm done spelling, I have two more reps. While my trainer counts - I spell:
K-e-l-l-y-R-i-p-a (her arms are my goal arms)
P-a-i-n-f-u-l
H-e-l-p-M-e
Anything to get my mind off of what's going on. Try it. I mean, you can't leave a word unfinished. All of us have been conditioned from years of schooling that an incomplete word means a big red X. You can't leave a word unfin. . . . ished (see!)
You can do it even if you don't have a trainer counting while you spell. Maybe you won't do exactly 20 reps if you spell out "I need to shave my legs". But hey, if you spell out "I need to shave my legs bad!" . . . you've done 21. You might impress yourself with what you can do.
And if this seems like a I'm treating this like a game, it is isn't it? It's a game of mind over matter. And I insist on winning. Besides, counting is so 2009
Below is the video "Three is a Magic Number" from Schoolhouse Rock. If it's gonna to be stuck in my head all day, I'm not going to suffer alone. So here!
So far, I've had seven training sessions (which I'll get to a bit later today) since embarking on this fitness journey and I've come to the conclusion that I am a wimp. Not a physical strength wimp but a mental wimp. When the going gets tough, I want to lay down and take a nap. Laziness is extremely tempting. In Nerd-uguese, if laziness were a gold ring, just call me Frodo. I know I have to get rid of the laziness, but it's calling to me, yelling at me: Sit back, grab some Funyuns and stare at the clouds. . . my precious!
My battle against the laziness is extremely evident when it comes to pushing through the burn. And when the burn starts on rep 2 of 15 during something like bicep curls, it's easy to persuade yourself to only do 13 reps (or *cough* five *cough*). I mean, I have no loyalty to 15. What has 15 done for me? 8, on the other hand, has done a lot for me. So, maybe I'll just do 8 reps.
I quickly realized that I was approaching all the exercises like a negotiation. If Larry or (my trainer from this week) Jenn wanted me to do 10 reps, I'd shoot for 7. . . or 3. 'Cause 3's a magic number! When it's 3 - you can see - it's a magic number!! Damn you ,Schoolhouse Rock, and your catchy tunes that get stuck in my head!
I came to the conclusion that counting reps was simply not going to work. It's just too easy to compromise, to give up. I had to find a way to get through these reps, to resist the laziness. I found my solution in spelling. that's right s-p-e-l-l-i-n-g reps instead of counting them! I started spelling anything that popped into my head. If I had twenty crunches to do, I'd spell out a whole sentence like: I-n-e-e-d-t-o-s-h-a-v-e-m-y-l-e-g-s. So it's not twenty letters exactly. That's not the point. The point is, by the time I'm done spelling, I have two more reps. While my trainer counts - I spell:
K-e-l-l-y-R-i-p-a (her arms are my goal arms)
P-a-i-n-f-u-l
H-e-l-p-M-e
Anything to get my mind off of what's going on. Try it. I mean, you can't leave a word unfinished. All of us have been conditioned from years of schooling that an incomplete word means a big red X. You can't leave a word unfin. . . . ished (see!)
You can do it even if you don't have a trainer counting while you spell. Maybe you won't do exactly 20 reps if you spell out "I need to shave my legs". But hey, if you spell out "I need to shave my legs bad!" . . . you've done 21. You might impress yourself with what you can do.
And if this seems like a I'm treating this like a game, it is isn't it? It's a game of mind over matter. And I insist on winning. Besides, counting is so 2009
Below is the video "Three is a Magic Number" from Schoolhouse Rock. If it's gonna to be stuck in my head all day, I'm not going to suffer alone. So here!
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
. . . say HA-AY!!
What exactly is this? you might be wondering. This, my friends, is the Precor 100i and it is my new best friend (aside from James Bond, my dog). If your gym doesn't have one, honestly, you should go complain because they are robbing you of its awesomeness.
I discovered this machine on Monday. Normally, I am not a big one on trying new things. Mainly because I hate looking stupid. I do it unintentionally way too many times a day to seek out opportunities to look stupid on purpose. Every cut, bruise, sprain or dislocation (a pinky, nothing hardcore like a shoulder) has been due to klutziness. But I needed to get closer to the TV to watch Keeping Up with the Kardashians (yeah, I admit it), so I decided to give it a try. SO glad I did.
It's hard to describe it if you've never been on it but it's like a stair climber, elliptical and treadmill all in one. It adapts to your motion. So cool! And it's so fluid, it feels like you're doing the workout in water. Let me say that again: It's like doing a water workout WITHOUT THE WATER!!!!! All the curly haired ladies in the house say HA-AY!!!
Even though I was sweating, my knees weren't cursing me out. And the best part. . . I made it 30 minutes. SUCCESS!!
For me, this was a great find. I love running (inside! I am not outdoorsy) but I HATE, HATE, HATE the bike. I wish I liked it b/c sometimes the treadmill gets boring. But I've hated bikes since I was little. I can't help but hear the Wicked Witch of the West theme music in my head when I see one. I'm completely serious. I made it through college and four-and-a-half years in Manhattan, NY where everyone is whizzing around on a bike without ever getting on one. While living in LA, I thought I could man up and get a beach cruiser so I could put my James Bond in a basket in the front. But I got hives in the bike store and had to leave. The only way I was able to handle a bike during my week with Larry is because he was standing over me. It would have been too embarrassing to say: Ummm, yeah, so I hear the Wicked Witch of the West song in my head every time I get on a bike and that makes me not want to ride it. Ever. Like I said, I do enough things to embarrass myself unintentionally throughout the day. I didn't need to throw that log on the fire.
Anyways, the Precor 100i is PERFECT. Such a great cardio workout without any of the strain.
Now, if you go to Rapid Fitness and you start using this as a result of reading this, HOORAY!! But the polite thing to do when you see me coming would be to get off so I can get on since I'm the one who told you about it (I kid, I kid. . . . kinda)
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Sunday, July 4, 2010
S is for Structure
This weekend has been brought to you by the letter S. As in:
I know that the first steps are always the hardest, but it's been difficult not to be hard on myself for having to take these steps. . . again. But I can't beat myself up about the past (at least not until I take advantage of one of the gym's Body Combat or Kickboxing classes). Besides, succeeding in these first few weeks back is going to take every ounce of energy I have.
From Monday until Thursday, Larry pushed my body to the limit. While I did finally get a camera to document my workouts, I'm extremely glad there was no camera to capture my face on my 11th or 12th rep of some of Larry's exercises. It was not cute.
On a related topic, for the first time in a long time, I had no trouble whatsoever falling asleep at night. The second my head hit the pillow. . . I was out. And you're talking to someone who has struggled with insomnia on and off for the greater part of the decade.
There have been moments where I've seriously thought about giving up and giving this blog a fairly abrupt/ anti-climactic ending w/ Journey's Don't stop believin' playing in the background (I'll give $1 to the first person who gets that reference) ~ but I've kept going. I haven't met any of my fitness goals yet (running on a 6.0 for 20 minutes without stopping, for example), but I have to remember that I won't get towards any of my goals by standing still. Someone told me once that your dreams are like a moving bus, and you have to race to catch it. It won't come to you, you have to run to it.
This past Friday I had a check in with Dr. Josh. He looked over my food journal which I had not done the best job at keeping up with this past week. As I mentioned previously, I admitted that I just didn't feel the motivation to write or do much of anything. This week, Dr. Josh suggested that I work on creating some STRUCTURE in my life. Structure... I know I've heard that word before. Didn't that used to be a cheesy men's clothing store that had all the Boyz-2-Men sweater vests a guy could want? He said without structure, long term success would be impossible. Right now I have him and the trainers, but the point of all of this is so that they can re-teach me how to do this on my own.
He had me set a small life goal, a health goal, and a fitness goal. I decided that my health goal is going to be to make one, really nice, healthy dinner this week. My sister sent me a great recipe for roasted kelp that sounds pretty amazing. My life goal is going to be to wash my car and organize all the papers I have in it. What does this have to do with anything? you might be wondering. For me, it has to do with organization. While it has nothing to do with writing, it is starting and finishing something which is what I haven't been able to do the past few months. My fitness goal? I'm not really sure yet. I'm kinda liking my early morning workouts. Who said that? Maybe a few more of those this week.
Lucky for me, we skip the weigh in this week (I'm not ready to see the number yet). But before I go, he checks out my grocery list and makes a few more suggestions. and no . . . I did not try and sneak Cheese-its on the list.
- Seventeen minutes past 7am - the time I woke up this morning. ON A SUNDAY
- Sixty. The age of the guy who kicked my butt on the elliptical trainer in front of me this morning. I was huffing and puffing after 17 minutes. Meanwhile, he was laughing and singing after being on for almost 40 minutes
- Sore. Still feeling the wrath of Evil Larry this week. But it's a good sore. I'm working muscles I haven't worked in ages. But I still can't give a High-5
- Sushi. I found a place that makes brown rice sushi!!
- Soaking. As in wet. As in my clothes after my battle on the bike yesterday. It honestly wouldn't surprise me if the bike was used as a torture device in medieval times.
- Structure. What I discussed on improving during my meeting with Dr. Josh on Friday. It has been noticeably absent from my life for a while.
I know that the first steps are always the hardest, but it's been difficult not to be hard on myself for having to take these steps. . . again. But I can't beat myself up about the past (at least not until I take advantage of one of the gym's Body Combat or Kickboxing classes). Besides, succeeding in these first few weeks back is going to take every ounce of energy I have.
From Monday until Thursday, Larry pushed my body to the limit. While I did finally get a camera to document my workouts, I'm extremely glad there was no camera to capture my face on my 11th or 12th rep of some of Larry's exercises. It was not cute.
On a related topic, for the first time in a long time, I had no trouble whatsoever falling asleep at night. The second my head hit the pillow. . . I was out. And you're talking to someone who has struggled with insomnia on and off for the greater part of the decade.
There have been moments where I've seriously thought about giving up and giving this blog a fairly abrupt/ anti-climactic ending w/ Journey's Don't stop believin' playing in the background (I'll give $1 to the first person who gets that reference) ~ but I've kept going. I haven't met any of my fitness goals yet (running on a 6.0 for 20 minutes without stopping, for example), but I have to remember that I won't get towards any of my goals by standing still. Someone told me once that your dreams are like a moving bus, and you have to race to catch it. It won't come to you, you have to run to it.
This past Friday I had a check in with Dr. Josh. He looked over my food journal which I had not done the best job at keeping up with this past week. As I mentioned previously, I admitted that I just didn't feel the motivation to write or do much of anything. This week, Dr. Josh suggested that I work on creating some STRUCTURE in my life. Structure... I know I've heard that word before. Didn't that used to be a cheesy men's clothing store that had all the Boyz-2-Men sweater vests a guy could want? He said without structure, long term success would be impossible. Right now I have him and the trainers, but the point of all of this is so that they can re-teach me how to do this on my own.
He had me set a small life goal, a health goal, and a fitness goal. I decided that my health goal is going to be to make one, really nice, healthy dinner this week. My sister sent me a great recipe for roasted kelp that sounds pretty amazing. My life goal is going to be to wash my car and organize all the papers I have in it. What does this have to do with anything? you might be wondering. For me, it has to do with organization. While it has nothing to do with writing, it is starting and finishing something which is what I haven't been able to do the past few months. My fitness goal? I'm not really sure yet. I'm kinda liking my early morning workouts. Who said that? Maybe a few more of those this week.
Lucky for me, we skip the weigh in this week (I'm not ready to see the number yet). But before I go, he checks out my grocery list and makes a few more suggestions. and no . . . I did not try and sneak Cheese-its on the list.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
My first mobile post! Woo-hoo! It's Saturday night and usually I only have enough energy to pop in a DVD or change the channel on the remote. But here I am (if you know me, brace yourself b/c you may pass out from shock)... Vacuuming! I honestly can't believe how much energy I have. Only a week and while I haven't seen results on the outside... Clearly there's a difference on the inside. Normally, I could only do this with the assistance of a few coffees or Diet Cokes. I guess my energy level is on the up and up!
". . . and right here is where you start paying . . .in sweat"
Up until this week I'd never given much thought to the popular gym rat phrase "feel the burn". I guess I forgot that it is very much a literal phrase. But I am getting ahead of myself. Let me back track to week one, the genesis of my training experience and the first trainer up: Larry from the North Ridge location.
Larry is this laid back guy with a hint of a New York accent who has this amazing ability to make everyone he's around feel hilarious. Not just funny. . . hilarious. He likes to laugh and after a few minutes with him, it's easy to feel that you're ready foramateur night at the comedy club a headlining show in Vegas. At the beginning of our first session, Larry explained to me that we were going to break our sessions up into 2 lower body sessions and 2 upper body sessions. Ummmm. . . . what? That makes FOUR!!! FOUR SESSIONS?!?!?!?! The butterflies in my stomach instantly go ballistic. My first instinct was to whine with a tone that would have had even Fran Drescher plugging her ears. What have I gotten myself into?
Larry's strategy is to go from exercise to exercise no break and mixing in some laps around the track, jumping jacks or the bike (my new nemesis) to keep the heart rate up. The philosophy is to give yourself an aerobic workout while working on your strength at the same time. I had always been one of those people who lollygagged (fabulous word by the way, greatly underused if you ask me) around from weight machine to weight machine in the gym. I thought aerobics classes and treadmills were the only way to work up a sweat. Clearly, I was mistaken. Not only was I sweating (like EWWW!) and breathing hard, but my muscles were quivering, muscles I didn't even know existed! This was a workout and a half! And all in 45 minutes. Forty-five minutes. That's all it would have taken per day to keep me from being as out of shape as I am now. Of all the hours that I've spent mindlessly watching bad reality tv or checking Facebook, less than one hour per day could have kept the cottage cheese from the FRONT of my thighs (laugh now teenage girls but cellulite can indeed make it's way to the FRONT of your thighs if you don't stay active. Laugh on THAT!)
Every time I thought I that one more rep was impossible, it was onto the next exercise. Between you and me, it was (dare I say it) fun. I had a trainer years ago that kind of scared me off of trainers for a long time. He was cool but he took me from machine to machine and that was it. I thought, "What the hell am I paying you for? I could do this on my own!" Larry's workouts were different. I've literally never seen exercises like the ones he used in my circuit. Monotony is one of the reasons I stopped going to the gym in the first place. Larry is just the guy to reintroduce me to the gym. His sessions were quite the opposite of boring. He's kinda like the McGuyver of trainers. Remember the slide? The one that made it's way into aerobics classes in the mid-late 90s and then vanished along with mini-backpacks and ck One cologne. Larry had me on that slide doing things that probably aren't even done in NFL camps. I have officially renamed it the deathtrap. One minute on "the deathtrap" and you will swear you hear the voice of Debbie Allen screaming at you, "You got big dreams?? You want fame? Well fame costs, and right here is where you start paying . . . in sweat!"
Have I mentioned the ab work yet? No?? Hahahaha. . . Ouch . . . it hurts to laugh. In a nutshell, oh yeah did we do some abs. The entire time, no matter the exercise, Larry makes me aware of pulling in my core muscles. Ha-Ha, muffin top!! You are about to go the way of the dodo bird!
I have not worked this hard in a LONG time. There's absolutely no beating around the bush: The first week back to the gym is hard. It's really hard. But it's also so rewarding. Feeling muscles that haven't had to lift anything (except a fork with food to my mouth) in a long time means I'm doing something right.
I made it. I survived. I feel as though I should get one of the t-shirts that one of Larry's other clients sports that says: "Body by Evil Larry" (not kidding). My body has been pushed to the limit. My body has been given a jumpstart and Larry was the jumper cables. I'd give him a High 5, but I can't lift my arms. Low 5's from here on out.
Larry is this laid back guy with a hint of a New York accent who has this amazing ability to make everyone he's around feel hilarious. Not just funny. . . hilarious. He likes to laugh and after a few minutes with him, it's easy to feel that you're ready for
Larry's strategy is to go from exercise to exercise no break and mixing in some laps around the track, jumping jacks or the bike (my new nemesis) to keep the heart rate up. The philosophy is to give yourself an aerobic workout while working on your strength at the same time. I had always been one of those people who lollygagged (fabulous word by the way, greatly underused if you ask me) around from weight machine to weight machine in the gym. I thought aerobics classes and treadmills were the only way to work up a sweat. Clearly, I was mistaken. Not only was I sweating (like EWWW!) and breathing hard, but my muscles were quivering, muscles I didn't even know existed! This was a workout and a half! And all in 45 minutes. Forty-five minutes. That's all it would have taken per day to keep me from being as out of shape as I am now. Of all the hours that I've spent mindlessly watching bad reality tv or checking Facebook, less than one hour per day could have kept the cottage cheese from the FRONT of my thighs (laugh now teenage girls but cellulite can indeed make it's way to the FRONT of your thighs if you don't stay active. Laugh on THAT!)
Every time I thought I that one more rep was impossible, it was onto the next exercise. Between you and me, it was (dare I say it) fun. I had a trainer years ago that kind of scared me off of trainers for a long time. He was cool but he took me from machine to machine and that was it. I thought, "What the hell am I paying you for? I could do this on my own!" Larry's workouts were different. I've literally never seen exercises like the ones he used in my circuit. Monotony is one of the reasons I stopped going to the gym in the first place. Larry is just the guy to reintroduce me to the gym. His sessions were quite the opposite of boring. He's kinda like the McGuyver of trainers. Remember the slide? The one that made it's way into aerobics classes in the mid-late 90s and then vanished along with mini-backpacks and ck One cologne. Larry had me on that slide doing things that probably aren't even done in NFL camps. I have officially renamed it the deathtrap. One minute on "the deathtrap" and you will swear you hear the voice of Debbie Allen screaming at you, "You got big dreams?? You want fame? Well fame costs, and right here is where you start paying . . . in sweat!"
Have I mentioned the ab work yet? No?? Hahahaha. . . Ouch . . . it hurts to laugh. In a nutshell, oh yeah did we do some abs. The entire time, no matter the exercise, Larry makes me aware of pulling in my core muscles. Ha-Ha, muffin top!! You are about to go the way of the dodo bird!
I have not worked this hard in a LONG time. There's absolutely no beating around the bush: The first week back to the gym is hard. It's really hard. But it's also so rewarding. Feeling muscles that haven't had to lift anything (except a fork with food to my mouth) in a long time means I'm doing something right.
I made it. I survived. I feel as though I should get one of the t-shirts that one of Larry's other clients sports that says: "Body by Evil Larry" (not kidding). My body has been pushed to the limit. My body has been given a jumpstart and Larry was the jumper cables. I'd give him a High 5, but I can't lift my arms. Low 5's from here on out.
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