I'll always be part cynic

 Week 3
 Day 18 

  Today I threw a bag of York Pieces (like Reece's Pieces but York Peppermint Patty) across the room.  Seriously, this candy has been in our house for a month. Is it the same bag? Do new bags keep showing up? Is it that there's more than one bag?? I do not understand how this candy is constantly under my nose, taunting me. It's starting to irritate me. Yeah, yeah, yeah psych majors - go ahead and analyze me for frequently giving anthropomorphic (yes, me know big words) qualities to food.  Say what you will, I think it's just because the McNugget Buddies and the California Raisins really messed with my head as a child.
  
I can't believe this week is already half over and I almost 3 weeks into this fitness journey (technically I started blogging 6/28, but I didn't start training with the trainers until 6/28).  Time is flying by.

   As I mentioned in a previous post, my "life" assignment this week was to send 10 positive words of encouragement and praise to friends.  So far I have 8.  It may seem like a silly assignment but it really isn't.  Making people feel good, makes me feel good.  When I feel good, I have more energy and more motivation to keep going with my own goals. Positive energy is contagious.  Plus, I believe that improvement on the outside only happens when there is improvement on the inside.  So, I'm making efforts to be a better me.

   Don't misunderstand, cynicism is kind of my trademark and I don't think I could completely let it all go. Who would I be without it?  I mean who would Whoopi Goldberg be without her signature dreads? Who would Bob Dole be if he didn't refer to himself in the third person? Who would Joan Rivers be without her plastic surgeon?  I'll always be part cynic.  But my goal is to be a cynic with a heart of gold.

  I can't wait to post about my training sessions this week.  While they are staying challenging and physically demanding, I am getting to the point mentally where I don't think I will die in the middle of a session.  I actually look forward to my morning workouts now, whereas before just the idea of waking up before 11am seemed like a punishment.  When my workouts are over, I feel like I accomplished something which is motivation to accomplish other tasks, large or small, for the rest of the day. 

   Friday, I may even let my trainer, Bryan W,  take my measurements and weigh me.  If you hadn't noticed, I've been avoiding the scale like the plague.  I don't know, I guess I don't want to get discouraged if it's not enough, or overzealous if it is.  I'm kind of nervous to fall off the tightrope I'm walking right now.  I feel like I have a perfect balance of healthy eating and exercising RIGHT NOW, but I'm scared to get overconfident.  My past includes periods of working out for hours on end like a manic AND sitting and doing nothing but eat.  I don't want anything to rock the boat.  I like the progress I've made, but I have to admit. . . . I don't quite trust myself with all these new, good habits. The good habits aren't quite branded into my subconscious yet.